What is Tantric Massage?
Tantric Massage is one small part of the wide ranging Tantric Arts. Some of the other disciplines include Tantric Yoga, Tantric Meditation, Tantric Breathing, and of course, Tantric Sex.
Here in the Midwest, Tantric Massage is a relatively new phenomenon. It has been steadily gaining in popularity on the east and west coasts. You should have no problem finding Tantric therapists in such places such as New York, Boston, Miami, San Francisco, LA and San Diego. There are even a few in Chicago now, I understand. But beyond those few cosmopolitan locations, it can be difficult to find a Tantric Massage Therapist.
It is also difficult to define Tantric Massage. Since there are no real standards, every therapist may do something different. So you can never quite be sure what you are getting when you hear the term "Tantric Massage". Often it is used as a "buzz-word" for a simple sensual or sexual massage. That is not the case here.
One of the primary purposes of Tantra (and Tantric Massage) is to awaken the Kundalini. The Kundalini is a very powerful, intense and healing form of energy that (for most people) is lying dormant at the base of the spine (the sacrum). To fully awaken this powerful energy can take years of devoted practice in the various disciplines of the Tantric Arts.
Once awakened, the Kundalini will rise from its resting-place under the sacrum and move up the spine, energizing and healing, eventually re-circulating throughout the entire body. The Kundalini is known to infuse a tremendous amount of energy into a person, and has an incredible ability to heal almost any affliction, be it physical, emotional or spiritual.
The reason that the Tantric Arts are gaining such popularity in our culture recently is due to one of the more pleasurable side affects. When the Kundalini is awakened, or drawn out, it also awakens the sexual energy in the body. The Kundalini is different and distinct from the sexual energy, but the two are connected & intertwined. So as the Kundalini is awakened and drawn out of hibernation, so also is the sexual energy in the body. Along with the Kundalini, it is channeled and circulated throughout the entire body. Needless to say, this can be very pleasurable, but it is important to keep in mind that this is only a side effect, secondary to the healing power of the Kundalini.
Friday, December 12, 2008
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
TANTRIC SEX TECHNIQUES
Tantric Sex Techniques to Reinvigorate Lovemaking By Amy Painter
Have you ever experienced a moment of sexual ecstasy? How did it make you feel? Exhilarated? Luminous? Deeply connected? Intense sexual experiences are one of our greatest sources of pleasure.
At the same time, sex is often regarded with an equal measure of fear and fascination. We may crave sexual intimacy to the core of our being, yet also take great pains to avoid it. We may wish to be touched with all of our heart, yet fear our own vulnerability. We may long to rekindle lost passion, but have forgotten how to light the fire.
The practice of Tantra shows us how to reclaim the sexual intimacy that is our birthright. And through this most ancient of arts, we may discover new joys of the erotic and expand mere moments of sexual ecstasy into a lifetime of sexual bliss. At a time when the stresses, fears and distractions of daily life threaten so many relationships, the age-old practice of Tantra shows us how to open our hearts, our emotions and our sexuality.
What Is Tantra?Although Tantra has long been practiced in many eastern cultures, it is just beginning to flourish in the United States. Born in India more than 6,000 years ago, Tantra emerged as a rebellion against organized religion, which held that sexuality should be rejected in order to reach enlightenment.
Tantra challenged the acetic beliefs of that time, purporting that sexuality was a doorway to the divine, and that earthly pleasures, such as eating, dancing and creative expression were sacred acts.
The word Tantra means "to manifest, to expand, to show and to weave." In this context, sex is thought to expand consciousness and to weave together the polarities of male (represented by the Hindu god, Shiva), and female (embodied by the Hindu goddess, Shakti), into a harmonious whole.
Couples need not adopt the Tantric pantheon in order to benefit from the sexual wisdom of this ancient art. Tantric sexual practices teach us to prolong the act of making love and to utilize potent orgasmic energies more effectively.
Tantra is also health enhancing. "Sexual energy is one of our most powerful energies for creating health," says Christiane Northrup, M.D., author of "Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom."
"By using sexual energy consciously…we can tap into a true source of youth and vitality."
How Is Tantric Sex Unique?In the West, we sometimes view sex as a source of recreation rather than a means of transformation. The goal may be to reach orgasm rather than to pleasure our lover or to connect with him or her more fully.This kind of lovemaking, say sex experts, has a distinct beginning and ending, with a climax somewhere in between and an average duration of 10 to 15 minutes. Given that women can take about 20 minutes just to reach full arousal, this type of sexual experience can be deeply unsatisfying.
In the Tantric model, the sexual experience is seen as a dance with no beginning or end. There is no goal, only the present moment of exquisite union. For this reason, lovemaking is meditative, expressive and intimate. Tantra teaches lovers how to extend the peak of their sexual ecstasy so that women and men can experience several orgasms in a single sexual encounter.
Leading teachers of Tantra suggest that even men who experience premature ejaculation can learn how to extend orgasm, and, with practice, to enjoy multiple orgasms. One of the most well known advocates of Tantra is the musician, Sting, who credits his fulfilling sex life to this ancient art. With ingredients such as love, trust and mutual respect, the magic of Tantra is available to couples of all ages and levels of sexual experience.
Beginning Tantric Sex TechniquesThe following exercises will help you reconnect with your body and with your partner in a profound way. As you move through these steps, do not focus on intercourse as the ultimate goal. Instead, simply enjoy giving and receiving pleasure using gentle touch and loving words.
Communicate with your lover to discover what he or she finds most arousing. Try to spend several weeks practicing the Tantric Intimacy Exercises without necessarily engaging in intercourse. For many, experiencing these erotic exercises with no pressure to "go all the way" helps release sexual guilt, builds trust and reawakens sexual desire. Enjoy!
Tantric Sex — Welcoming LoveMake time for each other every week. Plan a sexual rendezvous at least once per week. Set aside an hour or more of uninterrupted time to be together. Although it may be difficult to find the time or to manage children, you won't be able to benefit from Tantra if your relationship is not a priority.
Create an inviting atmosphere. Whether you meet in your bedroom, living room or another space in your house, creating a sacred space for each other will help relax you and bring you into the moment. Candles, fresh flowers, erotic art, finger foods and tantalizing aromas can transform any room into a temple of sexual delight. Even something as simple as dimming the lights and playing erotic music will help create a welcoming environment.
Dress provocatively. Or, wear nothing at all. Experiment with clothing or accessories that make you feel sexy and excite your partner.
Tantric Intimacy ExercisesUse ritual to develop intimacy. Begin your journey with a ritual. This may be something as simple as feeding each other delicious foods or sharing a glass of wine in the nude. Some couples enjoy bathing together in order to attune to each other.Take time to wash each other with loving care. Water relaxes the body and is a symbol of sexuality. Massaging each other is also an excellent way to fuse your energies. Or, read poetry to each other, dance, play, listen to music—work on developing new intimacy skills. Most importantly, use this time to communicate,sharing what you adore about each other. The idea is to help each partner feel loved and cherished.
In order to fully focus on each other (rather than on the goal of sex), some lovers experiment with various intimate rituals for several weeks before moving on to the next steps or engaging in intercourse. This is a wonderful way to strengthen the bonds of love and ignite passion.
Harmonize your breathing. "The only time we ever think about breathing is when we have trouble doing it, yet conscious breathing can be a powerful aid in sexual growth," according to sex therapist Marty Klein, Ph.D. of Palo Alto, California. Breathing exercises also quiet the mind and help you focus on each other.
Try this exercise: Sit quietly, cross-legged, facing each other. Rest your hands on your knees with your palms facing up. As you gaze into your partner's eyes, take soft, but deep breaths. Keep your eyes open, gazing beyond the eyes, into the soul. Although this may feel awkward at first, sustained eye contact is essential for building intimacy.
Now, pay attention to your breathing. Begin to breathe at the same pace, bringing air slowly in through your nose and exhaling through your mouth. Maintain eye contact while you breathe together. Practice this exercise until you can sustain eye contact and harmonized breathing for about 10 minutes. Then, you may move into the next exercise.
Experiment with erotic touch to fully appreciate your partner. This most pleasurable practice will help you become better lovers. Although you should continue to maintain eye contact, don't worry about keeping your breath synchronized. Breath will come back into play later. Guide your partner as you take turns stimulating each other. Describe exactly how you would like to be touched.
Share your desires in an encouraging way, making requests in a clear and loving manner. For example, ask your lover to caress your clitoris or penis (or any erogenous zone), encouraging him or her to apply more or less pressure, to stroke in a specific pattern, to use the tongue, etc. Thank your lover and let him or her know with words or sounds that you are enjoying this sensual touch.
Once you become comfortable with this process, you may wish to create a "pleasure chest." Include whatever excites you and your partner—a feather, vibrator, massage oil, blindfold, soft fabric, erotica and loving notes to each other are just a few ideas. As you pleasure each other, don't be shy about asking for something different. This is your time for appreciation, experimentation and for taking responsibility for your own fulfillment by asking for what you want.
From here, you may wish to embark on your own erotic journey. Create amorous adventures together, exploring new and creative ways to awaken each other's bodies and minds. Then, you will be ready for Tantric lovemaking.
Basic Tantric Sex TechniquesThe Tantric tradition emphasizes preparation for lovemaking. Erotic rituals such as those described above focus on exchanging pleasures, awakening the senses and allowing couples to communicate on deep physical and emotional levels.During this time, lovers are able to establish an intimate connection that can be maintained and heightened as they transition into the sexual dimension. Intimacy exercises are a form of extended foreplay, helping titillate lovers for the sex that is to come and create the optimal conditions for Tantric lovemaking.
As you experiment with Tantric techniques, don't worry whether you are doing something the "right" way. Tantra does not judge right or wrong, good or bad. Ultimately, your pleasure is what matters most.
Moving Toward Sexual BlissMaintain a deep level of intimacy. Continue to gaze into each other's eyes as much as possible. Sprinkle your lover's face, neck and shoulders with light kisses and whisper words of love and encouragement. Help each other feel loved and desired.
Keep it slow. A long, slow build helps men control orgasm and piques women's arousal. According to Tantric teacher, Robert Frey, the longer you linger in this process of building energy, the longer men can resist ejaculation. During this time, focus on each other. If your thoughts should wander, gently bring your attention back to the present, concentrating on your lover and the magic of the moment at hand.
Bring your attention back to your breath. Resist the urge to breathe quickly. Quick breathing or panting creates arousal, speeding you toward orgasm. Instead, take long, slow, deep breaths from the belly, exhaling gradually. You may match your breath to that of your partner, or try breathing alternately—as you inhale, your partner exhales. This moves energy back and forth and connects you to your lover.
Vary your positions to explore your duality. Different sex positions add to sexual pleasure and balance male and female energies. When lovers release themselves from gender roles, they are free to engage in deeper, more intimate sex. Men realize their sexual potential through surrender, by being soft and open, gentle and vulnerable. Women, in turn, can direct and initiate. As you experiment with different positions, some male-dominant, some female-dominant, explore your capacity to be strong and gentle, generous and receptive.
Multiple Orgasms for Menre and extend the magical energy of orgasm. By holding back, men can experience a series of "mini-orgasms."
This does not mean that you are never to ejaculate, but that you can control your climax. The essence, say Tantric experts, is to catch a wave of energy and to surf the edge without going over. Use these strategies to stay atop the wave:
Pump the PC muscles. The pubococcygeal (PC) muscles, which run from your public bone to your tailbone, are the ultimate sex muscles. These are the same muscles used to stop the flow of urine. If properly conditioned, the PCs enable you to stop ejaculation while continuing to enjoy sex. Kegel exercises are the best way to tone the PCs.
Here's how: Contract your PC muscles three times per day, squeezing 20 to 25 repetitions. This is a simple exercise that you can do at anytime. Just don't overdo it. After a month of conditioning, try to extend the squeeze, holding each contraction for two seconds. Gradually work up to 10 seconds. Once your PCs are in top shape, you will be able to pump them in order to ride the orgasmic wave without gliding over the brink too soon.
Relax. Although it sounds paradoxical, it's important for men to stay relaxed during high states of arousal. If you feel the undulations of ejaculation, take a slow, deep breath and stop making love long enough for your arousal to subside. Relax and try to direct energy from your penis up through your body.
Take this time to talk to your partner or to draw several slow, deep breaths. By experimenting, you will discover how much "time out" you require before catching the next wave. The idea is to allow yourself enough time for the intensity to subside, but not so much that you lose your erection.
Put it all together. When you and your partner make love, thrust slowly, allowing your arousal to build gradually. Before your excitement mounts, relax for a moment, tighten your PC muscles and take a deep breath. Resume your lovemaking, continuing to generate excitement.
Then, relax again, hold your PCs and breathe. Continue to ride this swell until you near the crest. Then, open your eyes, clamp down on your PC muscles and take a deep breath to experience the joy of orgasm without ejaculating. Since these techniques take practice, expect a few "wipe outs" before you achieve mastery.
Freeing Female OrgasmIt is often said that a woman's most powerful sex organ lies between her ears. Since desire can be short-circuited by fear, guilt, stress and a host of other distracting thoughts, women often need to concentrate on feeling rather than thinking when making love. Taking breaks to pleasure each other, manually and orally, is a great way to ward off any lingering diversions and to coax one or more orgasms.
Clitoral stimulation. Most women require stimulation of the clitoris and labia (the inner lips surrounding the clitoris) during sex to reach orgasm. Prolonged clitoral touch with a gentle, patient hand is, for many, the key to sexual ecstasy. Use sounds and positive words to guide your lover, showing your partner how to stroke you just so.
The sacred spot. The mythic Grafenberg Spot (G-spot) is referred to in Tantra as the "sacred spot." This potent and mysterious erogenous zone is located about two to three inches up on the front side of the vaginal channel. When your lover is aroused, slip your ring finger into her vagina allowing your fingertip to brush against the inner wall.
The G-spot is between the size of a pea and a quarter with a slightly rippled texture. For some women, though not for all, gentle stimulation can induce powerful orgasms and even female ejaculate. However, take care not to over-stimulate this sensitive spot.
Tantric Sex — A School of Many CoursesAccording to Tantric philosophy, lovers who have practiced these ancient techniques can learn to direct sexual energy through the body's "chakras," or energy centers. Moving the energy of orgasm through these physical channels is thought to create sensations of ecstasy throughout the body and to enhance health.
There is much to learn about this ancient art. "Tantra is a school of many courses in which there are many levels of study and an unlimited degree of potential for spiritual gain, for sexual delight, and for worldly success," state Charles and Caroline Muir, authors of "Tantra: The Art of Conscious Loving." Although they caution that Tantra does not promise instant results, for couples who wish to enrich their relationship, these practices "can release a particular kind of energy that can bring about harmony…and increase sexual pleasure and intimacy."
Have you ever experienced a moment of sexual ecstasy? How did it make you feel? Exhilarated? Luminous? Deeply connected? Intense sexual experiences are one of our greatest sources of pleasure.
At the same time, sex is often regarded with an equal measure of fear and fascination. We may crave sexual intimacy to the core of our being, yet also take great pains to avoid it. We may wish to be touched with all of our heart, yet fear our own vulnerability. We may long to rekindle lost passion, but have forgotten how to light the fire.
The practice of Tantra shows us how to reclaim the sexual intimacy that is our birthright. And through this most ancient of arts, we may discover new joys of the erotic and expand mere moments of sexual ecstasy into a lifetime of sexual bliss. At a time when the stresses, fears and distractions of daily life threaten so many relationships, the age-old practice of Tantra shows us how to open our hearts, our emotions and our sexuality.
What Is Tantra?Although Tantra has long been practiced in many eastern cultures, it is just beginning to flourish in the United States. Born in India more than 6,000 years ago, Tantra emerged as a rebellion against organized religion, which held that sexuality should be rejected in order to reach enlightenment.
Tantra challenged the acetic beliefs of that time, purporting that sexuality was a doorway to the divine, and that earthly pleasures, such as eating, dancing and creative expression were sacred acts.
The word Tantra means "to manifest, to expand, to show and to weave." In this context, sex is thought to expand consciousness and to weave together the polarities of male (represented by the Hindu god, Shiva), and female (embodied by the Hindu goddess, Shakti), into a harmonious whole.
Couples need not adopt the Tantric pantheon in order to benefit from the sexual wisdom of this ancient art. Tantric sexual practices teach us to prolong the act of making love and to utilize potent orgasmic energies more effectively.
Tantra is also health enhancing. "Sexual energy is one of our most powerful energies for creating health," says Christiane Northrup, M.D., author of "Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom."
"By using sexual energy consciously…we can tap into a true source of youth and vitality."
How Is Tantric Sex Unique?In the West, we sometimes view sex as a source of recreation rather than a means of transformation. The goal may be to reach orgasm rather than to pleasure our lover or to connect with him or her more fully.This kind of lovemaking, say sex experts, has a distinct beginning and ending, with a climax somewhere in between and an average duration of 10 to 15 minutes. Given that women can take about 20 minutes just to reach full arousal, this type of sexual experience can be deeply unsatisfying.
In the Tantric model, the sexual experience is seen as a dance with no beginning or end. There is no goal, only the present moment of exquisite union. For this reason, lovemaking is meditative, expressive and intimate. Tantra teaches lovers how to extend the peak of their sexual ecstasy so that women and men can experience several orgasms in a single sexual encounter.
Leading teachers of Tantra suggest that even men who experience premature ejaculation can learn how to extend orgasm, and, with practice, to enjoy multiple orgasms. One of the most well known advocates of Tantra is the musician, Sting, who credits his fulfilling sex life to this ancient art. With ingredients such as love, trust and mutual respect, the magic of Tantra is available to couples of all ages and levels of sexual experience.
Beginning Tantric Sex TechniquesThe following exercises will help you reconnect with your body and with your partner in a profound way. As you move through these steps, do not focus on intercourse as the ultimate goal. Instead, simply enjoy giving and receiving pleasure using gentle touch and loving words.
Communicate with your lover to discover what he or she finds most arousing. Try to spend several weeks practicing the Tantric Intimacy Exercises without necessarily engaging in intercourse. For many, experiencing these erotic exercises with no pressure to "go all the way" helps release sexual guilt, builds trust and reawakens sexual desire. Enjoy!
Tantric Sex — Welcoming LoveMake time for each other every week. Plan a sexual rendezvous at least once per week. Set aside an hour or more of uninterrupted time to be together. Although it may be difficult to find the time or to manage children, you won't be able to benefit from Tantra if your relationship is not a priority.
Create an inviting atmosphere. Whether you meet in your bedroom, living room or another space in your house, creating a sacred space for each other will help relax you and bring you into the moment. Candles, fresh flowers, erotic art, finger foods and tantalizing aromas can transform any room into a temple of sexual delight. Even something as simple as dimming the lights and playing erotic music will help create a welcoming environment.
Dress provocatively. Or, wear nothing at all. Experiment with clothing or accessories that make you feel sexy and excite your partner.
Tantric Intimacy ExercisesUse ritual to develop intimacy. Begin your journey with a ritual. This may be something as simple as feeding each other delicious foods or sharing a glass of wine in the nude. Some couples enjoy bathing together in order to attune to each other.Take time to wash each other with loving care. Water relaxes the body and is a symbol of sexuality. Massaging each other is also an excellent way to fuse your energies. Or, read poetry to each other, dance, play, listen to music—work on developing new intimacy skills. Most importantly, use this time to communicate,sharing what you adore about each other. The idea is to help each partner feel loved and cherished.
In order to fully focus on each other (rather than on the goal of sex), some lovers experiment with various intimate rituals for several weeks before moving on to the next steps or engaging in intercourse. This is a wonderful way to strengthen the bonds of love and ignite passion.
Harmonize your breathing. "The only time we ever think about breathing is when we have trouble doing it, yet conscious breathing can be a powerful aid in sexual growth," according to sex therapist Marty Klein, Ph.D. of Palo Alto, California. Breathing exercises also quiet the mind and help you focus on each other.
Try this exercise: Sit quietly, cross-legged, facing each other. Rest your hands on your knees with your palms facing up. As you gaze into your partner's eyes, take soft, but deep breaths. Keep your eyes open, gazing beyond the eyes, into the soul. Although this may feel awkward at first, sustained eye contact is essential for building intimacy.
Now, pay attention to your breathing. Begin to breathe at the same pace, bringing air slowly in through your nose and exhaling through your mouth. Maintain eye contact while you breathe together. Practice this exercise until you can sustain eye contact and harmonized breathing for about 10 minutes. Then, you may move into the next exercise.
Experiment with erotic touch to fully appreciate your partner. This most pleasurable practice will help you become better lovers. Although you should continue to maintain eye contact, don't worry about keeping your breath synchronized. Breath will come back into play later. Guide your partner as you take turns stimulating each other. Describe exactly how you would like to be touched.
Share your desires in an encouraging way, making requests in a clear and loving manner. For example, ask your lover to caress your clitoris or penis (or any erogenous zone), encouraging him or her to apply more or less pressure, to stroke in a specific pattern, to use the tongue, etc. Thank your lover and let him or her know with words or sounds that you are enjoying this sensual touch.
Once you become comfortable with this process, you may wish to create a "pleasure chest." Include whatever excites you and your partner—a feather, vibrator, massage oil, blindfold, soft fabric, erotica and loving notes to each other are just a few ideas. As you pleasure each other, don't be shy about asking for something different. This is your time for appreciation, experimentation and for taking responsibility for your own fulfillment by asking for what you want.
From here, you may wish to embark on your own erotic journey. Create amorous adventures together, exploring new and creative ways to awaken each other's bodies and minds. Then, you will be ready for Tantric lovemaking.
Basic Tantric Sex TechniquesThe Tantric tradition emphasizes preparation for lovemaking. Erotic rituals such as those described above focus on exchanging pleasures, awakening the senses and allowing couples to communicate on deep physical and emotional levels.During this time, lovers are able to establish an intimate connection that can be maintained and heightened as they transition into the sexual dimension. Intimacy exercises are a form of extended foreplay, helping titillate lovers for the sex that is to come and create the optimal conditions for Tantric lovemaking.
As you experiment with Tantric techniques, don't worry whether you are doing something the "right" way. Tantra does not judge right or wrong, good or bad. Ultimately, your pleasure is what matters most.
Moving Toward Sexual BlissMaintain a deep level of intimacy. Continue to gaze into each other's eyes as much as possible. Sprinkle your lover's face, neck and shoulders with light kisses and whisper words of love and encouragement. Help each other feel loved and desired.
Keep it slow. A long, slow build helps men control orgasm and piques women's arousal. According to Tantric teacher, Robert Frey, the longer you linger in this process of building energy, the longer men can resist ejaculation. During this time, focus on each other. If your thoughts should wander, gently bring your attention back to the present, concentrating on your lover and the magic of the moment at hand.
Bring your attention back to your breath. Resist the urge to breathe quickly. Quick breathing or panting creates arousal, speeding you toward orgasm. Instead, take long, slow, deep breaths from the belly, exhaling gradually. You may match your breath to that of your partner, or try breathing alternately—as you inhale, your partner exhales. This moves energy back and forth and connects you to your lover.
Vary your positions to explore your duality. Different sex positions add to sexual pleasure and balance male and female energies. When lovers release themselves from gender roles, they are free to engage in deeper, more intimate sex. Men realize their sexual potential through surrender, by being soft and open, gentle and vulnerable. Women, in turn, can direct and initiate. As you experiment with different positions, some male-dominant, some female-dominant, explore your capacity to be strong and gentle, generous and receptive.
Multiple Orgasms for Menre and extend the magical energy of orgasm. By holding back, men can experience a series of "mini-orgasms."
This does not mean that you are never to ejaculate, but that you can control your climax. The essence, say Tantric experts, is to catch a wave of energy and to surf the edge without going over. Use these strategies to stay atop the wave:
Pump the PC muscles. The pubococcygeal (PC) muscles, which run from your public bone to your tailbone, are the ultimate sex muscles. These are the same muscles used to stop the flow of urine. If properly conditioned, the PCs enable you to stop ejaculation while continuing to enjoy sex. Kegel exercises are the best way to tone the PCs.
Here's how: Contract your PC muscles three times per day, squeezing 20 to 25 repetitions. This is a simple exercise that you can do at anytime. Just don't overdo it. After a month of conditioning, try to extend the squeeze, holding each contraction for two seconds. Gradually work up to 10 seconds. Once your PCs are in top shape, you will be able to pump them in order to ride the orgasmic wave without gliding over the brink too soon.
Relax. Although it sounds paradoxical, it's important for men to stay relaxed during high states of arousal. If you feel the undulations of ejaculation, take a slow, deep breath and stop making love long enough for your arousal to subside. Relax and try to direct energy from your penis up through your body.
Take this time to talk to your partner or to draw several slow, deep breaths. By experimenting, you will discover how much "time out" you require before catching the next wave. The idea is to allow yourself enough time for the intensity to subside, but not so much that you lose your erection.
Put it all together. When you and your partner make love, thrust slowly, allowing your arousal to build gradually. Before your excitement mounts, relax for a moment, tighten your PC muscles and take a deep breath. Resume your lovemaking, continuing to generate excitement.
Then, relax again, hold your PCs and breathe. Continue to ride this swell until you near the crest. Then, open your eyes, clamp down on your PC muscles and take a deep breath to experience the joy of orgasm without ejaculating. Since these techniques take practice, expect a few "wipe outs" before you achieve mastery.
Freeing Female OrgasmIt is often said that a woman's most powerful sex organ lies between her ears. Since desire can be short-circuited by fear, guilt, stress and a host of other distracting thoughts, women often need to concentrate on feeling rather than thinking when making love. Taking breaks to pleasure each other, manually and orally, is a great way to ward off any lingering diversions and to coax one or more orgasms.
Clitoral stimulation. Most women require stimulation of the clitoris and labia (the inner lips surrounding the clitoris) during sex to reach orgasm. Prolonged clitoral touch with a gentle, patient hand is, for many, the key to sexual ecstasy. Use sounds and positive words to guide your lover, showing your partner how to stroke you just so.
The sacred spot. The mythic Grafenberg Spot (G-spot) is referred to in Tantra as the "sacred spot." This potent and mysterious erogenous zone is located about two to three inches up on the front side of the vaginal channel. When your lover is aroused, slip your ring finger into her vagina allowing your fingertip to brush against the inner wall.
The G-spot is between the size of a pea and a quarter with a slightly rippled texture. For some women, though not for all, gentle stimulation can induce powerful orgasms and even female ejaculate. However, take care not to over-stimulate this sensitive spot.
Tantric Sex — A School of Many CoursesAccording to Tantric philosophy, lovers who have practiced these ancient techniques can learn to direct sexual energy through the body's "chakras," or energy centers. Moving the energy of orgasm through these physical channels is thought to create sensations of ecstasy throughout the body and to enhance health.
There is much to learn about this ancient art. "Tantra is a school of many courses in which there are many levels of study and an unlimited degree of potential for spiritual gain, for sexual delight, and for worldly success," state Charles and Caroline Muir, authors of "Tantra: The Art of Conscious Loving." Although they caution that Tantra does not promise instant results, for couples who wish to enrich their relationship, these practices "can release a particular kind of energy that can bring about harmony…and increase sexual pleasure and intimacy."
Saturday, November 29, 2008
Better Female Orgasms - Increasing Libido and Female Orgasm Sensitivity
While there has been a focus on male sexuality enhancement over the past ten years or so, women have often been ignored when it came to sexuality research. The focus now seems to be shifting, and women's sexuality is suddenly attracting many researchers that are looking to improve and enhance female's sex lives. Diagnosing female sexual dysfunctions is the job for a professional, but women should try and understand their own sexuality in order to get the most out of their sex life. There are a variety of techniques that work for different women, and today there are also a number of female sexual enhancement products for both increasing libido as well as enhancing female orgasm sensitivity. This article is intended to shed some light on women's sexual enhancement and increasing female orgasms.
Sometimes women can suffer from a sexual dysfunction and they aren't able to enjoy a healthy sex life as they normally should. While some dysfunctions are more serious than others, many problems are not considered to be major and are easy to understand and even correct. Low female libido is a very common complaint amongst middle aged women, and is nothing to be concerned about. Sex drive is fueled by a number of hormones, and if these hormone levels fluctuate so do female emotions. Keeping these female libido hormones in check is the trick to maintaining a healthy sex drive. Some women can even suffer from decreased orgasm sensitivity, which can be very frustrating. Luckily, there are different techniques that can help, and even some cream products for this problem.
Different techniques can often be the key for increasing female orgasm sensitivity. This includes different positions as well as different stimulation techniques for bringing on female orgasms. Every woman is different, and individuals will need to find what works best for them. Most orgasms are stimulated through the clitoris, usually by rubbing, pressing, or using a vibrator against this hyper-sensitive part of the female anatomy. While this usually works for stimulating orgasms in females, others might find that they prefer vaginal stimulation to reach orgasm. Something that should be understood is that vaginal stimulation rarely results in orgasms, and the clitoris is almost always the easiest trigger for a female orgasm.
Beyond different techniques, there are now a number of effective products for female orgasm enhancement and increasing female libido. Although the past couple of decades have brought countless sexual enhancement products for men, it wasn't until the most recent few years that women's products came to the market. Now there are many natural products for increasing female libido, based on herbs and vitamins that are known to settle hormonal fluctuations in women. These products are all based on research from civilizations around the world, and many women are already taking some of the ingredients in these supplements, like Black Cohosh, Vitamins A, B, C, etc. Alternatively, for women suffering from decreased orgasm sensitivity there now topical creams, also completely natural. These new creams are allowing women that were never able to experience orgasms to reach new heights of pleasure. Being based on natural ingredients, these products are medically approved and safe for women of all ages.
Female sexuality problems have become the focus of a new group of researchers. A high percentage of women suffer from decreasing libido, an inability to come to orgasm, or a number of other sexual problems. While there is no simple answer to female sexuality, there are plenty of techniques and even some different products for female sexual enhancement.
Friday, November 28, 2008
GREAT REASONS TO HAVE SEX
Great Reasons To Have Sex
Author: Rodrigo Rehn
As we age, a lot of people see sex as an extra or something that they just do not have time for. The fact of the matter is that we should all make sex a priority in our relationships. The reason for this is not just because it allows for us to be close to our mate, but because there are many get side effects associated with having regular sex. Many are surprised by the benefits of having regular sex. Benefits of having sex include but are not limited to: Reducing the chance of heart attack and stroke by 50% in men. Sex is a great way to burn calories! 30 minutes is 200 calories gone! Sex can also help to cure irritability and agitation. Having sex even once a week can boost the immune system by 30%. Having sex regularly actually slows the aging process that we all fear. Those who have sex usually sleep better due to endorphins released afterward. Sex helps to tone the pelvic muscles, meaning better bladder control! Sex can relieve the pain associated with menstrual cramps. Women will benefit from regular sex in the way of a smaller buttocks! Regular sex means more regular menstrual cycles, which is a good thing! Sex can bring people back together, even after a nasty fight. Having sex can induce labor when a pregnancy has gone over term. Need to be more flexible? Sex can help with this! Sex can actually relieve a headache, so stop using it as an excuse and get busy! Sex is always a great topic of conversation! The more you have the more you can talk! The more you have sex the longer you'll be able to enjoy it as you get older. Men who have regular sex are less likely to develop prostate cancer. Sex can actually help people express their affection for one another. Having good sex is a confidence booster as it is nice to know that you are able to please someone in a sexual way. Sex is a great way to release tension. As you can see, there are a lot of great reasons to keep having sex as you age. Many relationships go from having a lot of sex to hardly ever having sex. If you don't have time or you don't have much of a libido, work on these things. Sex is beneficial in many different ways, even ways that we do not realize. As if you needed any, above are 20 great reasons to start having more regular sex. When you make it a priority you will find that sex is something that you actually begin looking forward to, even if you never have before!
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/sexuality-articles/great-reasons-to-have-sex-583716.html
About the Author:Rodrigo Rehn is a Relationships Expert, Linux Systems Administrator, Web Programmer, PHP Developer and CEO of FaceRomance personal ads for singles.
Author: Rodrigo Rehn
As we age, a lot of people see sex as an extra or something that they just do not have time for. The fact of the matter is that we should all make sex a priority in our relationships. The reason for this is not just because it allows for us to be close to our mate, but because there are many get side effects associated with having regular sex. Many are surprised by the benefits of having regular sex. Benefits of having sex include but are not limited to: Reducing the chance of heart attack and stroke by 50% in men. Sex is a great way to burn calories! 30 minutes is 200 calories gone! Sex can also help to cure irritability and agitation. Having sex even once a week can boost the immune system by 30%. Having sex regularly actually slows the aging process that we all fear. Those who have sex usually sleep better due to endorphins released afterward. Sex helps to tone the pelvic muscles, meaning better bladder control! Sex can relieve the pain associated with menstrual cramps. Women will benefit from regular sex in the way of a smaller buttocks! Regular sex means more regular menstrual cycles, which is a good thing! Sex can bring people back together, even after a nasty fight. Having sex can induce labor when a pregnancy has gone over term. Need to be more flexible? Sex can help with this! Sex can actually relieve a headache, so stop using it as an excuse and get busy! Sex is always a great topic of conversation! The more you have the more you can talk! The more you have sex the longer you'll be able to enjoy it as you get older. Men who have regular sex are less likely to develop prostate cancer. Sex can actually help people express their affection for one another. Having good sex is a confidence booster as it is nice to know that you are able to please someone in a sexual way. Sex is a great way to release tension. As you can see, there are a lot of great reasons to keep having sex as you age. Many relationships go from having a lot of sex to hardly ever having sex. If you don't have time or you don't have much of a libido, work on these things. Sex is beneficial in many different ways, even ways that we do not realize. As if you needed any, above are 20 great reasons to start having more regular sex. When you make it a priority you will find that sex is something that you actually begin looking forward to, even if you never have before!
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/sexuality-articles/great-reasons-to-have-sex-583716.html
About the Author:Rodrigo Rehn is a Relationships Expert, Linux Systems Administrator, Web Programmer, PHP Developer and CEO of FaceRomance personal ads for singles.
Monday, November 24, 2008
How to Masturbate - A Guide for Women
Overview
Most women orgasm from stimulation of the clitoris. Others can only orgasm from vaginal penetration, also known as vagina, nipples, inner and outer labia, clitoris and perineum. Orgasm may be reached by stroking these parts of the body. The clitoris and labia are usually the most easily stimulated, so different types of pressure, speed and motion should be tried on these areas. Many women have very sensitive nipples, and can actually reach orgasm from nipple stimulation alone. If you are close to reaching orgasm but cannot climax, try altering your breathing and giving extra stimulation to the nipples.Breathing is also important for orgasm. Breathing deeply (rather than holding your breath) helps release sexual energy, rather than fight it. While you breathe, clench and release the PC muscle, much as in Kegel exercises. As you begin to orgasm, continue the stimulation lightly through the orgasm, or stop if it feels like it's too intense. Slightly lessen stimulation during the first extremely sensitive moments but do not stop because there are small "aftershocks" after an orgasm, slightly less intense but pleasurable physical feelings. If you don't orgasm on your first try, continue to practice. Practice breathing from your belly.Helpful Hints• Lubrication (Wet, Astroglide or any that are sold in most drugstore chains)• Vibrators• Dildos • Climatique Sexual Enhancement Gel• Recall a previous sexual encounterMasturbation has many beneficial effects.
Most women orgasm from stimulation of the clitoris. Others can only orgasm from vaginal penetration, also known as vagina, nipples, inner and outer labia, clitoris and perineum. Orgasm may be reached by stroking these parts of the body. The clitoris and labia are usually the most easily stimulated, so different types of pressure, speed and motion should be tried on these areas. Many women have very sensitive nipples, and can actually reach orgasm from nipple stimulation alone. If you are close to reaching orgasm but cannot climax, try altering your breathing and giving extra stimulation to the nipples.Breathing is also important for orgasm. Breathing deeply (rather than holding your breath) helps release sexual energy, rather than fight it. While you breathe, clench and release the PC muscle, much as in Kegel exercises. As you begin to orgasm, continue the stimulation lightly through the orgasm, or stop if it feels like it's too intense. Slightly lessen stimulation during the first extremely sensitive moments but do not stop because there are small "aftershocks" after an orgasm, slightly less intense but pleasurable physical feelings. If you don't orgasm on your first try, continue to practice. Practice breathing from your belly.Helpful Hints• Lubrication (Wet, Astroglide or any that are sold in most drugstore chains)• Vibrators• Dildos • Climatique Sexual Enhancement Gel• Recall a previous sexual encounterMasturbation has many beneficial effects.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
G SPOT STIMULATION
Where is the G Spot?
If your partner is lying on her back, then her Grafenberg Area, commonly known as the G Spot, is located roughly 1.5" inside her vagina on the upper wall. The most ultimate orgasms come from a woman having her G Spot stimulated. This area inside the vagina typically has a different texture; ridged (not as smooth) as the rest of her vagina, and when aroused feels spongy. A G Spot orgasm is often associated with the mystical legend of female ejaculation and 15-30 minutes of a euphoric sensation where she is in complete bliss... Don't expect much from her during this time, she is in heaven.
G Spot Technique
With your fingers approximately two to three inches in, move your fingers in even circles all around the inside of the vagina. It generally feels best if you keep consistent, firm pressure along the entire length of the vaginal walls while fingering. You may wish to give a LITTLE extra pressure towards her belly as long as you don't break the steady rotational rhythm. Stop rotating your fingers and rest your fingertips on the (usually slightly ridged) area of the vagina just behind the pubic bone and exert pressure towards her belly (upwards). This is direct G Spot stimulation, and it usually feels best if the fingers are subtly moving. You can move your fingers in small, slow circles, or point your fingers more sharply and rock them back and forth.
An advanced and very successful technique is a combination of the two. Trace the inside of her vagina with your finger(s), while moving in and out. Make sure that your fingertip always hits the g spot on each rotation. Finding a nice rhythm is critical in this technique, and when you get it right, she’ll be asking you how you learned that!
Stimulating G Spot During Intercourse
This topic is covered in greater detail in the vaginal intercourse article in the Intercourse section, but keep in mind the angle you position yourself during intercourse. Being able to stimulate the G Spot during intercourse will definitely increase the likelihood of your partner reaching orgasm through intercourse.
Toys
Sexual toys are a great way to enhance your sexual experiences. They can vibrate, stay hard, and best of all they don’t get tired. There is no better way to learn how to experience vaginal orgasms then by using a vibrator to help you figure out how to use your body better. If there is a way to stimulate it, there is a sex toy to automate the process and to no surprise this holds true when referring to the G Spot.
If your partner is lying on her back, then her Grafenberg Area, commonly known as the G Spot, is located roughly 1.5" inside her vagina on the upper wall. The most ultimate orgasms come from a woman having her G Spot stimulated. This area inside the vagina typically has a different texture; ridged (not as smooth) as the rest of her vagina, and when aroused feels spongy. A G Spot orgasm is often associated with the mystical legend of female ejaculation and 15-30 minutes of a euphoric sensation where she is in complete bliss... Don't expect much from her during this time, she is in heaven.
G Spot Technique
With your fingers approximately two to three inches in, move your fingers in even circles all around the inside of the vagina. It generally feels best if you keep consistent, firm pressure along the entire length of the vaginal walls while fingering. You may wish to give a LITTLE extra pressure towards her belly as long as you don't break the steady rotational rhythm. Stop rotating your fingers and rest your fingertips on the (usually slightly ridged) area of the vagina just behind the pubic bone and exert pressure towards her belly (upwards). This is direct G Spot stimulation, and it usually feels best if the fingers are subtly moving. You can move your fingers in small, slow circles, or point your fingers more sharply and rock them back and forth.
An advanced and very successful technique is a combination of the two. Trace the inside of her vagina with your finger(s), while moving in and out. Make sure that your fingertip always hits the g spot on each rotation. Finding a nice rhythm is critical in this technique, and when you get it right, she’ll be asking you how you learned that!
Stimulating G Spot During Intercourse
This topic is covered in greater detail in the vaginal intercourse article in the Intercourse section, but keep in mind the angle you position yourself during intercourse. Being able to stimulate the G Spot during intercourse will definitely increase the likelihood of your partner reaching orgasm through intercourse.
Toys
Sexual toys are a great way to enhance your sexual experiences. They can vibrate, stay hard, and best of all they don’t get tired. There is no better way to learn how to experience vaginal orgasms then by using a vibrator to help you figure out how to use your body better. If there is a way to stimulate it, there is a sex toy to automate the process and to no surprise this holds true when referring to the G Spot.
WHAT IS TANTRIC SEX?
What is Tantric Sex?
Author: Gabrielle Moore
Tantric sex has many names in today's culture: spiritual sex, sacred sexuality, spiritual union, and others. However, a common denominator in all these names is that they all relate to some level of spirituality.
Tantric sex is indeed related to your spiritual well-being because even though you are engaging in the sexual act, the purpose is not really to reach orgasm but to unite with your lover in ALL possible aspects. To put it simply, tantra lovemaking is not about intercourse per se, it's about uniting or fusing together your bodies, and in the process connect with your partner in mind, body and spirit.
Tantric Sex History
Tantric sex has its roots in India some 4,000 years ago, where it was viewed as - what else - a spiritual tradition. It started to be known in the West in the early 1800s but it never really had a tremendously huge following.
However, in the late 1960s, a rebirth of the practice was reaching new heights in India and this led to its consequent re-emergence in Western culture. Today, tantric sex awakening is reaching an all-time high because you now also have such high profile couples advocating the benefits of tantric sex. For instance, when Sting mentioned on Oprah that he and his wife Trudie engage in tantric sex, which enable them to experience 'five or six or seven hours of lovemaking', the whole world wanted to find out what tantric sex is all about!
As mentioned, tantric sex is not just about 'sex', it involves many things: tantric breathing, tantric sexual massage, creating a scared tantric place, meditation, prolonging sexual intercourse, and even tantric after play. All of these have a special purpose in tantric lovemaking.
Tantric Sex vs. 'Normal' Sex
The main difference between tantric sex and lovemaking as we commonly view it today is this: reaching an orgasm. With regular sex, you have a goal - to reach your climax and that's it. However, since men and women have different needs, more often than not, one of them (mostly women) do NOT reach their sexual goal (climaxing) and so there is a lot of pent up sexual frustration in today's relationships. It is thus no wonder that a lot of relationships have underlying stresses.
Consider these common scenarios.
- He reaches his orgasm but she never does, resulting in sexual frustration for her.
- He's a very caring guy and wants her to experience sexual pleasure but it takes her a long time to 'come' and so it's building up performance anxiety and sexual frustration for him.
In contrast, Tantric sex is not about reaching an orgasm. It's about union. The main purpose is to connect with your lover in all aspects: heart, mind, body and soul. Does this mean you don't reach an orgasm with Tantric lovemaking? Of course not!
On the contrary, Tantric sex practitioners swear that they have never had more body-rocking and mind-blowing orgasms before they tuned into to Tantra sex. So don't worry; you're in for A LOT of sexual pleasure with this form of spirituality.
Getting Started with Tantric Sex
The best way to get started with Tantric sex is to start slowly. Begin by viewing your sex partner in a different light. Try to see her as a goddess, a sexual playmate that you hold in the highest regard, and that making love to her is not just about physical pleasure in your groin area but about ecstasy in all aspects of your being.
Try this exercise: get a piece of paper and list down all the beautiful qualities or everything you like about your woman. Some men like to list down everything, even 'great cook!' or 'best woman driver I know' because, according to them, it helps them appreciate her more. Others, however, prefer to just list down sexually-related aspects such as 'I love how her hair sways when she's on top of me', or 'she has the best looking ass I know'. Write down whatever aspect you feel like listing that will make you see her in a whole new light. Whatever works for you!
After creating your list, look over it and then close your eyes and revel in each of these qualities. Now, picture making love to her. Don't you see her now more than just someone to reach an orgasm with?
Lastly, people who engage in Tantric sex love it because 'things just keep on getting better'. Tantric lovemaking believes in this doctrine: practice, practice, practice! Yet at the same time, Tantric sex provides immediate improvements in your sex and spiritual life. So go try it. You have nothing to lose and so much to gain.
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/sexuality-articles/what-is-tantric-sex-342264.html
About the Author:
Gabrielle Moore is owner of The Female Orgasm Revealed, a site to help men please their female partners with an orgasm every time. For more information, go to: http://www.femaleorgasmrevealed.com/
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